It's been about a year since I posted a blog post. Whew, what a year it has been. I'm sure so many people, or pretty much all of us can say the same thing. Hello 2020! I think you're going to kick my butt, so all I can say is bring it!
One of my New Year's Resolutions is to write a blog once a month, more if I can! Let's not push it though...I have a 3 year old, a baby on the way, my husband leaves a lot and we're going to PCS again, so let's stick to one a month ;).
Since it's been awhile, I'm going to reintroduce myself.
My name is Megan. I'm a 32 year old stay at home mommy to a crazy, stubborn, but happy 3 year old little girl. I married my handsome man, who happens to be in the army, over 6 years ago. I'm originally from Texas (the best state, duh) and moved soon after N and I got married. We moved to Augusta, GA and lived there for about 4 and a half years and then moved to Tampa, FL where we currently reside. I'm not a professional writer, and I honestly just blog for myself and hope that it will reach someone it needs to and that my writing will hopefully help at least one person. I have had a lot happen in my past, some that I have wrote about in my past blogs. I will catch you up real quick!
Around 9, I developed an eating disorder. It was later that it was defined as anorexia nervosa, because I was pretty good at keeping things quiet. I had bulimic tendencies as well. I have suffered from depression, anxiety, self harm and suicidal ideations for the majority of my life, it comes with the ED territory ;) When I was 16, I was the worst I had ever been and was told I was not going to make it through the night while I was in the ER waiting to be placed in an eating disorder (ED) unit. I didn't believe them and thank God I did actually make it. I suffered a lot through that year and everything was kind of a blur, but I managed to get "a hold" of ED, up until a little in college. The second worst relapse I had was when my husband and I got married. It was shortly before, but once we got married things quickly went downhill and I was in and out of the hospital the first year of our marriage while we were in GA. It turns out I was struggling a lot not just because of ED, but because I had PTSD from a rape that occurred when I was about 19. This happened a lot, I don't delve into a lot, because it's still very uncomfortable to me. I didn't know it happened, only because he made me believe it was my fault and that I "asked for it," even when I fought him and said no. He made sure my self esteem (which was little anyways) was shot. I grew up knowing that sex was an important act and should be shared with someone you are married to and love. So when it happened, it messed me up a lot. It's something I still struggle with, but am still working on. Big props to the hubby for sticking with me through it! After a few hospitalizations in GA, I was sent to UNC Chapel Hill to their ED unit. I hated it, but it was the consistency I needed for a longer period of time to get me back on my feet. Since I've been in strong recovery, I have made it my mission to help others. I love to speak about the importance of knowledge and dangers of eating disorders. I have lived through this nightmare a long time and if I can help one person, even just give them hope, what I have done is worth it.
I'm also a momma! We recently found out we are pregnant again, which is terrifying and exciting! We're expecting a baby boy in June of 2020. My daughter, who is known as E on here, is 3 years old and was born at 33 weeks, while she was not breathing when she came out, she has shown us to be quite the fighter and nothing has stopped her since. We've had a struggle with her development since about 4 months old. She started PT and OT about that time and we added ST at a year and she's been in them since. She did stop PT this last January because E started walking! We're about to start it back up though, but hopefully it won't be as much! Adding in neurology, pediatric developmental pediatrician, a pediatric psychology (still waiting on this one) and a genetics specialist, we have quite the schedule! Not to mention she goes to school 3 days a week, which has been such a blessing! She's come such a far way though, and proves to be just as stubborn as always. It's hard to see how far she's come with I'm with her all the time, but she's blowing everyones minds right now at how well she is doing. It's also frustrating with no diagnosis minus global developmental delay, which doesn't really say much haha. Aside from that, she still our happy girl! (most of the time, I mean she's 3 lol tantrums galore over here).
Last, but definitely not least, I'm married to a soldier, who I call N on the blog. While it's not really something I brag about, being a military wife is tough. Moving, tricare, not being near family or close friends, having to make new friends (which is SUPER HARD when you have anxiety like I do haha!), tricare, moving, not knowing where you're going next, tricare, getting set up in a new place, deployments, tricare, husband TDY all the time, did I mention tricare? haha. I am so proud of N, but there are times I just wish I could move back to GA and be with my best friends and a place that we called home for so long. I also can't believe I just said I'd move to GA over Texas haha. WHAT IS HAPPENING TO ME?!
I'm excited you came to find my blog and look forward to getting to know some of you guys as well! My goal is to update monthly, so keep an eye out!
Also, as stated on my previous blogs, I struggle with perfectionism so I never go back and reread my blogs to fix errors. I just write and post, so enjoy that and hope all you grammar people don't kill me ;).
Till next time!
<3 M
